Today... Went to library... Wif my sis... Anisa followed too... We went to raffles place after dat... My sis was feeling guidy in the train and her lips were white... So, we went to Mc Donald to let her have her lunch...

After dat, we walked about n then... From there, we walked to the white bridge and jalan punye jalan... My sis wanna see the merlion... So, we saw the merlion n then... Went to the esplanade... Guess what? My thoughts... Are always lingering... That you are wif me... But then... [sigh] it was just a memory... That I can't forget... I just feel like crying... After walking around the esplanade, we went to Marina Square...

Kadangkala mata ni macam gatal gitu... Toleh je... Nampak satu couple ni ngah cium... Alahai... Ape la mata ni n_n hehe... At Marina Square... It's anisa n my turn to have our lunch... Cari KFC macam cari treasure gitu... We walk for so far and then... Bila patah balik... There it is x_x hehe... Tak biase sangat gi Marina Square... N guess what? You were the one who introduce me this place... MArina Square... I remember it's when I watched Pirates Of The Carribean wif you... That memory lingers in my mind... Haiz... Wherever I go, ur always in my mind... Sometimes, I just feel ur presence... But when I look around... It's just an illusion...

At KFC... Had a great time... I burst into laughter... I ordered my meal... Which was Zinger... Anisa ordered the Banditto meal... I'm told to wait for my Zinger... Anisa was told to wait for her cheese fries n Banditto... I get the full set... Mountain Dew, Cheese fries, tissue paper, fork and chilli sauce... Except for the zinger... Anisa only get water... Kesian... Den, the zinger n cheese fries came together... Anisa didn't get her tissue paper, fork and chilli sauce... So, I asked that guy for chilli sauce... He came back wif 7 packets of chilli sauce in his hands... MAk engkau... Betul2 dia kasi chilli sauce... Den, I asked for a fork and my sis asked for tissue paper... Kesian dia... Macam kene bully gitu kan?

Dia kata "Eh, bully kepe?" He took one stick n showed it to us... We burst into laughter... Ignoring the rest of the customers who were looking at us... Kelakar giler... I think jsut now was the time I laughed real hard... After the incident about us that became history... [sigh] I ate my meal... then, my thougths linger on to him... The first time we met, KFC was the place we went... You asked whether I want to eat anything but I dun want... I only drink milo... I ate silently... I did laugh tapi ketawa itu hanya lah satu kepuraan... My thought always linger to you... Saw this couple... Oh well... They just seem to be like us last time...

Y can't I just let go of everything? I tried... But it's really difficult... After finished eating our lunch... We went to the toilet... From then on... I kept quiet... On my way back nak gi MRT station, saw Nasri... My primary sch fren... We waved at each other... N exchanged smiles too... Saw Hady Mirza video at this HMV shop... Seeing Hady Mirza's face on the album... Makes me smile... [grinz] The path to take to go the the MRT station was the same... Like last time we walked together and u sent me back to clementi...

See? I can't stop thinking of you... Y CAN'T I??????!!!!! argh????!!!!! In the MRT, I kept quiet... But when I get to sit next beside anisa, I asked her... Should I give back ur presents or not... She asked me what present you gave me... I showed her the ring and also... Tell her the teddy bear that u give me... She said buat ape simpan kalau menyakitkan hati? Tapi, it's up to you... Kalau nak simpan buat satu kenangan pun boleh... [sigh] I thought of my kakak angkat... What she said was true... That I set up my own trap... Being in a relationship wif him... But that feeling came without force... When u told me that I won't regret being wif u n left my kakak angkat... It's the other way round now... I kinda lost both of you...

I cried... Those tears that I tried to control fall down my face... You were just so special... And some more... You said you would support me taking express malay... Now, it's like... I dunno who will support me taking that subject... Just feel like I wanna stay taking normal academic malay... Oh well... I guess I have to face this challenge... Hidup mesti berani terima kenyataan... I have to move on... Though it's difficult... Life is never easy... Insya allah... DenganNYA di sisi, akan ku tempuhi segalanya... Aku hanya inginkan dirimu bahagia... With or without me by your side...

Biarlah aku bersendirian dalam mengembara mencari sinar kebahagiaan di tengah-tangah gelita kekecewaan ini... Semoga sang mentari tetap sudi menemaniku, menyuluh lorong mana yang harus kulalui... Semoga sang rembulan juga tetap setia mengekori setiap langkah kakiku menuju kebahagiaan... Kesunyian malam yang membalut diri, kuratah sendirian... Dalam kesepian itu aku menangis... Aku merintih pedih... Kini hiburan malam bagiku hanyalah satu kepuraan yang ku cipta sendiri yang hanya berlandaskan mood...
Memang aku amat bosan sekarang ini, tapi apa kan daya aku terpaksa menghadapinya... Kemungkaran cinta dan janji yang dia lakukan sekarang akan kuhadapi dengan tenang dan tabah... Ketabahan itulah yang sangat-sangat kuperlukan...

Guess what? I have some good news!!!!! I have been awarded the Edusave Scholarship 2006 for achieving excellent results... The Scholarship is awarded to the top 10% of students... [grinz] Oh well... I'm blessed =D Tapi kan... I wouldn't have won this scholarship if I didn't study hard... and the one who motivate me was you... You wanted me to do well... And the result show... You give me the time to study... and that give me the strength to do well for my exams... Coz ur by my side and is always motivating me... Now... I dunno if we could be this close... I really hope so... You give me the strength to face all my challenges... That was in the past... MY sec 3 year... Oh well...

There's gonna be new subjects... Can I cope? I just needed the strength... [sigh]

hmm... K la... GTg... I've post long enough...

Take care...

Signing Off,
Haneesah