I'm back from malaysia... Went shopping at the shopping mall at KL... Bought a blouse n one long skirt... I get a notebook too... And also... Duit raya? N some lotion or bath gel... Banyak juga barang2... [grinz] At KL there was so many cats... Early in the morning when I woke up... After I had my prayers... THe cat will meow... Guess it's hungry... N when it is given food to eat, they eat... Pity them living in cages... x_x
Went to the room that was given to me... Read a book... As usual, a malay novel... "Dia Di Hati"... Sometimes when I was lost in my own thoughts,
*ur* always in my mind... I just can't stop thinking of
*u*... Wondering what
*ur* doing... N wajahmu yang menjelma... Kadangkala ada suka... Dan kadangkala ada duka... I did enjoy myself in malaysia... Though kadangkala, kesepian dan kesenyuian menguasai diri ini... I told myself that this stay in malaysia will fly by... And it did...
Kepulanganku ini seperti tiada kesan apa2 dalam dirimu... I get the news... That
*u* were in the hospital when I'm in malaysia... Maybe that's y in malaysia, i had the thought of tak nak ikut... Scared that something may happen... N it did... [sigh] N I wasn't by
*ur* side...
Sangkaanmu terhadapku... You thought I didn't trust you... Tapi itulah yang paling menakutkan... Kadangkala kalau terlalu mempercayai... Sesuatu yang tidak disangkakan boleh berlaku... Sampaikan
*u* had the thought... "if we break up....." Oh god?! Berita apakah ini... I dun think I could face this... Kebahagiaan bersamamu seperti satu mimpi yang pasti... Dan sekarang... semuanya hancur... Mimpi yang buruk... Those promises... And that time, I remembered
*u* said that "I won't leave you"... Then, now... And I thought I was blessed to know
*u*... Coz
*ur* always there for me... The loneliness that once were in my heart... Disappeared wif
*ur* presence... Then now... [sobz] I dun wanna say...
I cried just now... I dun want it to end... I really treasure
*our* relationship very much...
*You* told me not to slit my wrist if I treasure 'us'... Dengarkanlah rintihan ini... Walau ape pun berlaku... I did accept
*u* whoever
*you* are... And kasih sayang yang telah dicurahkan tidak akan pudar... It's been 5 months plus we have been together... And from
*u*, I learnt the meaning of cinta, rindu dan bagaimana hendak mengatasi hidup ini... To me,
*ur* really special... I dunno if there's anyone in the world like
*u*... *Your* presence means so much to me...
I'm really scared to lose
*u*... Please don't leave me... [sobz]
Signing Off,
Haneesah